A few thoughts:
Watch Out
Our 4 year-old is boy crazy. Whenever she sees certain cute adult male friends of ours, she gets a silly look on her face and glossed over eyes and then timidly approaches. Then she latches on until we pry her off. Heartbroken. Amelia and I took a moment this past week to give a collective "uh-oh" as we gazed 10-12 years into the future.
Just Surrender
Have you looked at (or under) your children's fingernails lately? If you are a normal parent, it may seem to be a teeming germ playground or the color of Hilary Clinton's soul. Perhaps you usher the child to the sink and help them get rid of the offending grime. Not me. When my first instinct is to vomit when I see how long they have gotten or to scream when my face is scratched by gnarled dirt extensions and I'm sure rabies will set in, I let good old laziness and denial rule the evening because unless it's bath night or before 7 pm, I can't be bothered with the intricacies of child manicures.
Second Place is First Loser ... and That's Totally Fine With Me, Honey.
You know the old saying even when you win an argument, you lose? Yeah. Um, first of all, in marriage, the husband should never try to win. Ever. Second, when you think the kids skipping a night of teeth brushing is OK because it's already 10:30 pm and your wonderful wife disagrees and wants them to brush, tell them to do what she says. Don't try to prove a point. Don't get cute with her. Don't offer a helping of sass. A closed mouth and a nod of "yes" will make 10:30 pm to midnight go a lot better. And I say this with all the seriousness of my heart.
Real Father's Day
This past Father's Day was the best ever. It marked my first as a real Dad. And I got to spend 80% of it in the bedroom. If you know what I mean. Wait. Stop. We have two kids. What did you think I meant? But seriously, Amelia is so sweet. She gave me the best gift this man could get: my own time frame. She, without any regret, pouting or guilt trips, let me do whatever I wanted the whole day. If I wanted to take a nap, she supported me. If I wanted to sit at the computer for hours fighting goblins with my brother, it was cutely encouraged. And when we were ready for bed and both tired from a long weekend, she gave me the best back rub ever. I love this woman.
Finally ...
Breaking News: Foot Injury to Cost Yanks' Wang at Least 6 Weeks
Someone explain to me how a foot injury could put that Yank fellow's penis out of commission.
